Motherhood is often painted as a perfect, glowing journey. But for Shivani Ahuja, it has been a space of unlearning, growing, and showing up with honesty. Born and raised in Rajasthan, her upbringing was rooted in structure, discipline, and doing things the “right way.” But becoming a mother changed that. Today, she is learning to lead with emotional awareness, choosing presence over perfection, and raising her son in a way where he feels heard, not just guided.
Her journey through the first eight months is raw, real, and deeply relatable. It is about broken sleep, messy milestones, quiet wins, and the kind of love that reshapes you completely.
How has your upbringing shaped your motherhood?
My upbringing was rooted in structure, discipline, and doing things “the right way.” But becoming a mother has softened that in me. I’m learning to raise my son with more emotional awareness, less perfection, more presence. I want him to feel heard, not just guided.
What feels most challenging in your routine right now?
Right now, unpredictability is the hardest part. Just when I feel like I’ve figured out his routine, it changes. I’m learning to let go of rigid expectations and focus more on rhythm than routine.
How do you stay mentally balanced on repetitive days?
Some days do feel repetitive, and that can feel overwhelming. What helps me stay balanced is stepping outside. Even a short walk or just fresh air resets my mind. And honestly, creating content has become my creative outlet in this phase.
How has your experience with solids been?
Solids have been messy, unpredictable, and honestly humbling. One thing I’ve learned is to not chase how much he eats. Some days are better than others, and that’s okay. I focus more on exposure than perfection.
What do your nights look like right now?
Nights are a mix of frequent wake-ups and short stretches of sleep. It’s exhausting. What’s helping me cope is reminding myself that this is a phase, not forever. Lowering expectations has helped more than any sleep trick. I also try to rest whenever he naps during the day.
How do you manage constant supervision without feeling overwhelmed?
He puts everything in his mouth, and yes, it can feel exhausting to constantly watch him. I’ve learned to create safe spaces instead of trying to control every moment. That shift has really reduced my anxiety.
Have you ever felt completely overwhelmed as a mother?
Yes, there have been moments where I’ve felt completely overwhelmed and questioned if I’m doing enough. What helps me is pausing, stepping away for a bit, maybe a short walk or a conversation with another mom, and reminding myself that he doesn’t need a perfect mother, just a present one. And honestly, when I come back, I feel even more connected to him.
What is one thing you chose to do your own way?
One thing I chose to do my own way is not blindly following every piece of advice, whether it’s from people around me or social media. I take what feels right for my baby, with logic and understanding, and leave the rest. I’m learning to trust my instincts more.
What everyday moment reminds you it’s all worth it?
The way he looks at me when he’s excited, like I’m his whole world. That one look resets everything for me.
How are you holding on to your identity?
Creating content has been that one thing for me. It helps me stay connected to who I am beyond motherhood, while still being deeply rooted in it.
What is one honest piece of advice for another mom in this phase?
You don’t have to enjoy every moment to be a good mother. Some days are hard, and that doesn’t take away from your love.
A Real Reminder for Every Mother
Shivani’s journey is a reminder that motherhood is not about getting everything right. It is about showing up, even on the hard days. It is about choosing presence over perfection, and love over pressure.
If there is one thing to take away, it is this. You are allowed to have hard days and still be a wonderful mother.
Every mother has a story that deserves to be heard. If you would like to share your journey and be featured, DM us at @softsens Instagram and become a part of our growing Mama Tribe.
